


You're Allowed to be Human

by ridethemaverick



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, brief Karolsen mention because i'm sad all the time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-05
Updated: 2020-01-05
Packaged: 2021-02-27 06:34:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,972
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22132624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ridethemaverick/pseuds/ridethemaverick
Summary: Alex has a heart to heart with Kelly's mother days before their wedding.
Relationships: Alex Danvers/Kelly Olsen
Comments: 7
Kudos: 43





	You're Allowed to be Human

**Author's Note:**

> I don't fancy myself a fic author and will probably never write for Dansen again. Far more talented people are already doing so but with fandom content, I'm more inclined to simply fill in the gaps. So far I don't believe I've read anything that really digs into Kelly's past and her relationship with James. So, I made an attempt.

_“Are you ready?”_ Alex asked a slightly nervous looking Kelly as they waited for her mother to arrive at the hotel.

_“Am I ready? Are YOU ready? You’ve been ready jump out of your skin for days.”_

_“I’ve just-I’ve never met anyone’s mom before. I mean anyone that I was-that I-"_ Alex scratches the back of her head, a nervous habit.

 _“I know what you mean. Don’t worry. She’s going to love you. Everyone does, especially me.”_ Kelly reassures her and kisses her cheek.

Just then a rather elegant looking dark-skinned black woman strides through the doors with a small rolling suitcase in her hand.

 _“Hi, honey. You look good. Healthy.”_ She hugs Kelly. _“Hi, mom”_ Kelly rolls her eyes. _“You must be Alex”_ she decides, not giving Kelly time to introduce them. _“Nice to meet you, Mrs. Olsen”_ Alex extends a hand. _“It’s Anita, dear. Mm. So, you wanna marry my Kelly, huh?”_ Alex feels like she’s being accused of something she’s absolutely guilty of, _“Yes ma’am! Very much, ma’am!”_

 _“Well, you sure don’t need my permission. And I trust my daughter’s judgement. I trust her choice in you."_ Kelly feels like her mother is laying this on really thick. She always overcompensates. And then Kelly admonishes herself for always putting her mother under such intense scrutiny. _"And besides, I hear you’re bonafide National City hero!”_ Anita gushes. Alex blushes. _“I don’t know about that.”_

 _“I do.”_ Alex hears him before she sees him. _“James! You’re one to talk, Guardian!”_ She reaches up to hug her very tall friend.

Anita looks on adoringly at her children, both embracing Alex now. _“You know, your father would be so proud of you both.”_ Alex doesn’t know what about the statement exactly causes the mood to shift but James immediately drops his hand from her shoulder and Kelly’s grip on her hand tightens.

 _“You don’t know that though, mother. You can’t speak for a dead man!”_ Kelly storms off. Alex stands frozen in shock because that was about the least Kelly-like response to anything she’s ever seen from Kelly. James follows after his little sister, leaving Alex alone with their mother.

 _“I-I’m sorry, I don’t…I don’t know what that was.”_ Alex looks on after their fading figures.

Anita looks down, guilt drawn onto her features. _“I do.”_ She then rights herself. She looks to Alex with renewed determination. _“So, y’all got good coffee in National City?”_ Alex takes the hint. _“We have really_ decent _coffee in National City”_ Alex offers. _“Let’s go get some.”_

\---

 _“Kelly, wait!”_ James jogged to catch up with Kelly. _“Listen, just-you knew that she was coming. You invi-“_

 _“I know! I know and I thought we were in a good place. Or maybe we are and it’s just me. Just hearing her mention dad right away was too much, too soon.”_ Kelly gestures the enormity of the situation with her arms.

 _“Hey, I get it. You’re getting married. You were right to invite mom. We’ve just gotta get used to her being around. Listen, we’re gonna get through this together. We’re a team.”_ He places both hands on her shoulders and gently squeezes.

 _“We’re a team now? Is that why you left as soon as I got here, James? Cause you left, too!”_ And part of that was about recent events but part of that was about something deep in the past and James knew it but he reacted anyway.

 _“That’s not fair! How can you even…?”_ He lets it hang in the air. The devastation written across his face is like a stinging slap to Kelly’s. She’s spiraling and she’s reaching for something that is evading her. Control. Her control. Her careful control. Her aggressively calm demeanor. 

_“Oh, god, James. I’m so sorry. I think I just need to be alone for a while.”_ She walks away. He lets her.

\---

 _“Kelly was a hard young woman.”_ Anita starts as they grab a table at Noonan’s. Alex is already hanging on her every word. _“You wouldn’t know now but she...well, after their father died, I got distant. I couldn’t be a mother to my children. They lost their father, then they lost me, too. I sent them away. I thought I was doing the only thing I could do.”_ Alex looks on with rapt attention, coffee forgotten.

 _“Kelly was a bright, bubbly child.”_ Anita paused, looking lost in fond memories of a little Kelly Olsen. _“And after suffering so much loss back to back -that’s too much for a kid. James was a child himself and dealt with his pain on his own. I found out later that she was gay. She was gay, black and a woman. Guess she felt like the whole world was against her.”_ Alex didn't realize she was crying until Anita slid a napkin over to her.

 _“She and Jimmy grew apart after he graduated from high school. At least that’s what my sister told me. Kelly didn’t invite any family to her college graduation, and she went to the Army that same summer. Two years. For two years I didn’t hear a word from my baby.”_ Alex leaned forward, _“What changed?”_ She wondered because Kelly’s mother is certainly describing a woman she doesn’t know.

 _“Her work, I think. Kelly needs to fix things. She needs to understand things to make peace with them. Once she thought she understood why I 'withdrew into myself'_ , Anita said with air quotes and an amused smile that said ' _her words, not mine_ ,' _“and why she guarded herself so fiercely, she was able to let go. Mostly.”_

Alex was starting to understand. _“But not all the time. Probably not when she actually has to face you in person”._ Anita nodded. _“I think my being here might do more harm than good. But that’s what I’ve been thinking for most of my children’s lives so I’m just trying a new approach.”_ Alex gently reached for Anita’s hand across the table. _“You’re here. You’re trying and it matters. Kelly knows that.”_

\---

Kelly hears Alex’s keys in the door. Something Kelly is aware of and fully embraces is the anticipation of Alex’s return and the way her heart speeds up when she hears the sound of those keys. But today, there’s a sense of dread. She lashed out. She embarrassed both her mother and her fiancée. She’s going to have to answer for that.

 _“Hey.”_ Alex treads softly, unaware of Kelly’s mood when finally finding her in the kitchen. _“Hi”_ Kelly responds just as meekly.

Alex takes that much as a sign it’s safe to enter. She sits at the bar stool in front of the large counter while Kelly fixes herself a snack.

 _“So, I had coffee with your mother.”_ Kelly’s so caught off guard by that that she drops the knife. The clattering of the metal and the tile is still not louder than the pounding of her heart in her chest. _“Why would-why?”_

 _“I thought she just wanted to get to know me.”_ Alex responded as she got up and picked the knife up off the floor. She found herself inches from the woman she loves, and, for the first time, felt unwelcome into her personal space. _“But she wanted me to get to know you, I think.”_ She finished, stepping back.

_“Why do you never talk about your childhood, Kelly?”_

_“Alex.”_ Kelly warned.

_“No, I’m serious. You said you went to live with your aunt. I only know that because that’s where you and James went when J’onn’s brother was after you -to her house. I don’t know how I never realized that you never really talk about your past aside from your first fiancée.”_

Kelly doesn’t understand why she’s so defensive today but she really can’t seem to stop herself. _“So you have one conversation with my mother and you think you know everything about me?”_ She’s just a shocked as Alex at the venom in her tone. _“I don’t-I’m sorry. I’ve been doing this all day.”_

Alex sees Kelly is in pain and instantly forgets her own. _“I think you’ve been being honest all day.”_

Kelly offers a humorless laugh in response to that.

Alex stands up to round the corner again. _“Is this why you hide that pain? You don’t want to lose control? Get angry? Hurt people?”_ Kelly nods. _“I-I guess so.”_

 _“Kelly, I don’t want a healthy shell of a damaged person. I mean, I don't think you're damaged but I think you have layers of trauma and I don't want you to hide that. I want you, all of you, Kelly Olsen. You’re allowed to break down. You’re allowed to not have all the answers, to get mad. To not understand yourself all of the time. You’re allowed to be human”_ Kelly breaks down in Alex’s arms. She's so broken, into so many heavy pieces, that they both fall to the floor under her weight.

Alex rocks her gently and kisses her forehead. _“I just…”_ Kelly tries through heavy sobs to speak, _“I just wanted my daddy at my wedding.”_ And that much Alex can relate to, thinking of her own father and sparing a tear for who he used to be to her, she whispers, _“I’m sure you did.”_

\---

The next day guests pile into a reception hall for the rehearsal dinner. Alex and Kelly greet everyone with warm smiles and laughter. They didn’t realize they could get any closer but the final wall that neither realized was between them had been broken through.

For the second time in as many days, Kelly looked up to see her brother and mother enter together. She looked to James and was overcome with deep gratitude for her brother. She mouthed an apology to him and he nodded and smiled and she knew they were good again. They were complicated and they always would be but they loved and respected each other and that would always bring them back to one another with open arms.

Anita hugged Kelly and her new daughter, tightly. _“Listen, Kelly, I want the happiest day of your life to be the happiest day of your life. What I’m saying is if you don’t want me here -I don’t know that I’ve earned that-“_ Kelly hugged her mother again, cutting her off. _“Mom, I’m sorry! I want you here, you are my mother. And, actually, I would very much like it if you stayed in National City. I want you in my life, mom.”_

That surprised everyone. Kelly surprised herself a bit as well. But, she knew she meant it. She felt she only had herself for so long, at different points in her life. Now, she’s found a new family. A big one. She was done shutting people out.

 _“Oh! Well, I will have to think about that. I could maybe do that for you.”_ Anita said with a haughty confidence that got a laugh out of Alex. _“Besides, you two are too busy to watch my future grandbabies full time. I’m not letting a nanny anywhere near them.”_

This delighted Alex and if Kelly felt any remaining bitterness toward her mother, it didn’t show anymore.

Anita turned to James like he was caught in her crosshairs. _“Now, when are you gonna settle down, Jimmy? You can’t find a woman across three cities to marry?”_

James looked at his shoes, flustered, then across the room and replied, _“Let’s just say you’re not the only one thankful for second chances.”_

The other three followed his loving gaze to Kara, who suddenly noticed them all staring at her, but most pointedly, James, and ducked her head in a bashful smile.

Anita laughed, _“Well, well, must be something about those Danvers, huh?”_ and James and Kelly realized they’re never going to be too old to be embarrassed by their mother.


End file.
